LEGEND Text Colors = Cartman ~ Stan ~ Kyle ~ Kenny ~ Butters ~ Others ~

Season 13 THEME SONG has Kenny singing the same verse as he did in Seasons 12, 11 & 10.5
( go to the KENNY THEME page for more )

The Ring - #1301 e182

[ in school hallway ]
"Kenny! Hey hey Kenny!"
"Oh hi guys."
"Listen, Kenny, we need to, talk about your new girlfriend."
"What about her?"
"Hoh boy."
"Kenny, we know you really like this girl, but..."
"But what?"
"Well, we've heard that she's..."
"Kenny, your girlfriend is, a notorious whore. She even gave a kid named Dave Darsky a BJ in the parking lot of TGI Fridays."
"Huh?"
"Your girlfriend's a slut, dude."
"WOOHOO!! Wooohohoo! Yeah hey, yay!"

[ still in school at Tammy's locker ]
"Hey Tammy!"
Hi Ken. You decide what you wanna do after school?"
"Yeah, I was kinda thinking we could go to TGI Fridays"
"TGI Fridays?"
"Yep. I like the food!"
"Yeah, okay. But, listen, uh there's something I need to talk to you about. There's a lot of rumors going around about me, that I agreed to give a boy a BJ? Well, it's true. But it was before you and I were together, and it wasn't my fault! See, I was watching the Disney Channel, and that show came on with the Jonas Brothers."
"Jonas Brothers?"
"You know that teenage boy band? Every time I see them I get so, tingly! I just completely lose control. And then Dave Darsky showed up and took me to TGI Fridays, and, it just, happened. But it was only for one second, and I had my eyes closed. I know it's terrible. Can you, can you forgive me, Ken?"

[ at the Ticketmaxx store ]
"There you are, young man, two tickets to the Jonas Brothers concert."
"Thanks!"
"The Jonas Brothers? Dude, Kenny, what the hell is wrong with you?"
"Aren't they those queermos on the Disney Channel?"
"Yeah..Tammy said if I got her the tickets for the concert she would give me a BJ!"
"A BJ?"
"You want Tammy to give you a BJ?"
"Of course, dude!"
"Kenny! You're gonna let a girl put her mouth on your wiener? Do you know how disgusting that is? Girls' mouths are full of germs!"
"Yeah dude, that's gross."
"I don't care, I've gotta get some protection."
"What kind of protection?"

[ at a drugstore ]
"I'd like a bag of condoms, please."
"Bags of condoms, certainly, little boy. What kind would you like?"
"Uhhhm, I'll take one of those"
"These here? Why certainly."
"Cool!"
"Kenny, aren't you a little young for this?"
"No, and Goddamnit I want a BJ!"
"Just because you have condoms doesn't mean you're safe, Kenny! Statistically speaking, the most bacteria-ridden place on the planet is the mouth of an American woman! And you're gonna let that near your penis?"
"Yep! Woohoo!"

[ at The Denver Pepsi Center & The Jonas Brothers concert is over ]
"Oh my God, I am so worked up! I just want to attack you, Kenny!"
"All right! Come on, let's get out of... Woohoo!"
"They want me to come backstage? Oh my God!"
"Look, they're nothing but..."
"It's a dream come true!"
"Hey!"

[ backstage at the dressing room ]
"Yeah, come on in everyone. The band is waiting for you. Uh, not you."
"Hey, that's not fair! I got the second ticket!"
[ after dressing room door closed ]
"Hey! What the heck?"

[ at the bus stop next morning ]
"Well well well, here he comes. It's BJ McKay and his best friend Bear."
"So how did it go last night?"
"What's that?"
"A purity ring."
"Purity ring?"
"Yes, a purity ring."
"Well, what does that mean?"
"It means I can't get a BJ or have any sex until I get married."
"Dude, you? We thought you really wanted to have a BJ before you got too old an..."
"I do! And...!"
"Alright alright Kenny, calm down. You're too young to be getting BJs anyway. It's good you and Tammy are making a commetment to each other that isn't based on sex."
"Yeah. But this sucks! I'm trying to get a BJ and..."

[ at a bookstore ]
"We've had just about enough, dude! You've been blowing us off for two weeks now! What's up?"
"Look at this, more DVDs."
"You want your Grey's Anatomy back, Kenny?"
"Oh, Grey's Anatomy. Cool! Oh man, this is a great DVD. We're gonna have the ... sex, yeah."
"Hold tight, buddy. We're gonna find a cure for you."
"Yeah..."

[ in Tammy's living room ]
"And not getting a blowjob..."
"Aw Ken, look what we've become. We're way too young to be this boring."
"I agree. Let's put in this DVD and watch Grey's Anatomy"
"No! I don't want to watch Grey's Anatomy, Ken. Let's take off these rings, Ken."
"Take off the ring? You said, take off the ring? Really?"
"Let's take them off and just be kids again. There'll be plenty of time to wear rings and be boring and lame when we reach our late 30s and we're boring and lame anyway."
"Yeah. Screw this crap!"
"Oh I feel better already!"
"Me too!"
"What say you and me... go to TGI Fridays?"
"Woohoo!!"

:- at the end, there is a funeral for a young man that died of syphillis & Cartman did warn Kenny about germs, so it must have been him. )~
NOTE: sixth time since Kenny Died episode

The Coon - #1302 e183

Margaritaville - #1303 e184

Eat, Pray, Queef - #1304 e185

Fishsticks - #1305 e186

Pinewood Derby - #1306 e187

Fatbeard - #1307 e188

Dead Celebrities - #1308 e189

[ at the hospital next to Ike in bed ]
"Hey! What the hell are you doing inside my little brother?"
"Wee, I'm a child. I knew I was a child. See? Come on, let's play! Let's go climb a tree."
"Oh (?) shit, dude!"
"Come back here!"

[ at Stan's room ]
"Alright, let's see, demonic ghosts, animal ghosts"
"Go back a little.
"setting traps for ghosts, no"
"Okay, here's the one part that really makes no sense to me, the first time you saw blood stains on your underwear, were you alarmed?"

[ at Tiny Miss Pageant inside Holiday Inn Select ]
"And now welcome contestant number 27, little Miss Michael Jackson."
"Go on by, Michael."
"? ? ?"
" Yeah yeah rah work it Michael work it!"

"Dude, the two male judges love her."
"Yeah."
"Alright, that's about enough!"

"You'll win for sure, Heidi. You know how much that judge adores you."
"Aw dide, this is hopeless."
"Son of a fucking(?) bitch!"
"Wait, wait! Wait, look at the lady judge. She's eating Chipotle."

Butters' Bottom Bitch - #1309 e190

TBA - #1310 e191

TBA - #1311 e192

TBA - #1312 e193

TBA - #1313 e194

TBA - #1314 e195

~ Kickass! Shop of South Park ~